You hear mention of domestic abuse frequently. Perhaps we all think we know what it is and that we’d be aware if it was happening to us. But, do you know what? We often don’t. A friend asked me once if I thought my ex was abusive. I think she asked this not long after…
Divorce
Dating With Young Kids: The Reality
It’s an irony that’s hard to get around… If you’re a single mum, chances are you went through a lot to gain your single status; divorce and separation aren’t the only ways to single motherhood, but they are the most common. Once you’ve got out of some shit awful relationship and learned to deal with…
18 Tips To Deal With An Absent Dad
Absent dads are a hugely sensitive topic. Absent usually means the non-existence, however, absent dads can be more complicated than that. We often don’t know if dad is gone for good, or if/ when he may return. Infrequent or sporadic contact can be equally, if not more, challenging to deal with. Seventeen percent of fathers…
Recovering From A Breakdown
Trigger warning, talks about mental ill-health, baby loss, separation and the struggles of motherhood. Recently I saw an incredible piece of performance art by Bryony Kimmings; I’m a Phoenix, Bitch. It had me in tears almost from the first second I walked through the door (which admittedly was about fifteen minutes after the show had…
My Writing In Review: 2018
2018 hasn’t been quite as busy writing wise as 2017 was; thirty posts, not including this one. I did make a baby though, so it’s not too bad going. The year started with a post about new years resolutions – a promise to myself to be a little more selfish when it came to who…
A Family of Three: Six Months On
Somehow, my baby is six months already. Six months. Six months of parenting two and I’m not sure what to say. I read other posts about such milestones. They focus on the ups and downs of the baby and child bonding, of the conflicts of loving two littles, and of the exhaustion of doing it…
Dads
Dads, dads, dads. Daddy, daddy, daddy. Papa, baba, tata, abba. It doesn’t matter what way you say it. Kids seem obsessed. My son claims he doesn’t have a daddy. Though I tell him he does. But according to him daddies live with their children. I try to explain people he knows where the daddy doesn’t…
Guest Post: When Do You Introduce Your Children to a New Partner?
“When do you introduce your children to a new partner?” It’s a common question on single parenting forums the world over. Everyone has their own views. Some introduce new partners quickly – arguing that they want to know whether their children and the new partner will get on, others vow never to introduce a new…
Life After Divorce: A Letter To My Newly Divorced Self
Dear Newly-Divorced-Me, It’s you here, well me – only now I’m three years into this divorce malarky so I’m a bit more clued up than you – the me of yesteryear. I remember the first day you were alone. It was hell. Actually scrap that, hell requires you feel the pain. You were numb and everything…
I Want To Be A Mum: Raising A Boy As A Solo Mum
“You be the baby, I be the mummy”, my son tells me for the seventeenth time today. It’s his favourite game. “You could be daddy”, I suggest. “No, I want to be mummy”. “Daddies look after babies too you know”, “no, mummies look after babies”. As a self-proclaimed feminist I feel I’m somewhat failing at…