I went to the doctor’s today. Told them I wasn’t coping. Suddenly everything feels very real. “Depression” was bandied around. I haven’t been coping for the last three years, so it’s not like it’s a new thing. But I’ve had to cope, had to carry on regardless. I haven’t been allowed to stop and breath…
Abuse
Missing in Action: Mental Health and My Son’s First Years
Trigger warning – this post talks quite openly about mental health and thoughts of self-harming, if you are yourself struggling with similar issues there are links to support groups at the bottom. The first two years of my son’s life have been incredibly hard. It’s not been the parenting parts per se (though they have…
Co-Sleeping With My Toddler
I was co-sleeping with my son until he was about 13 months old, then, out of sheer desperation for a decent night’s sleep following my return to work, I reluctantly put him in his own room. To my surprise he bloody loved it. He loved the independence and instantly started to sleep (slightly) better. It was…
5 Ways Blogging Saved My Life
Blogging save my life. It sounds dramatic right, but it’s true. I always dabbled in writing but a cruel twist of fate meant that my treasured writings and journals that I had hand written from the age of nine were destroyed around the same time as I ‘lost’ my husband and became a single mum. Those…
That Moment When You See Your Ex’s Wedding Photo
I’d convinced myself that I was OK with him remarrying. That I didn’t give a shit. And I don’t, give a shit that is, in many ways. But to see how he’s moved on. To see how he has a new life. One that involves happiness, even if that’s not the only story. When I…
How Breastfeeding Cleansed Me
Trigger warning: this post talks about abuse. When my son was breastfeeding today he pointed at my nipple and said ‘dirty’ (it had kind of wrinkled up). ‘No, it’s clean’, I replied, slightly surprised by his comment but not too phased. Then it struck me, I actually meant it. For the first time in my…